WEEK 4: “This is my daughter, take her number…”

My naivety was the only thing supressing my laughter.

‘Surely he can’t be doing what I think he’s doing?’

It all started with the question “how old are you”. It’s an honest question, but still a question best played with children, most of whom have no distinction between 20, 30 and 40, so for me being 35 can only end with an encouraging undestimation. However, Mr Moseley’s (I’ve changed his name) guess was somewhere between 42 and 44. It’s a swing and a miss, Mr Moseley. However, my baldness and poor choice in moisturiser wasn’t going to deter him from trying to marry me to his daughter within 5 minutes.

Step 1 was to show me pictures of his lovely daughter.

Step 2 involved a reveal of her age – a very marketable 20.

By step 3 I was talking to her on his phone. She spoke English. Wonderful.

Step 4 was to make sure I had WhatsApp so I could take her number and message her.

Step 5 was a reply on WhatsApp. It read: “Praise the Lord brother!”

By now I’ve heard the two words “my daughter” almost as much as I’ve heard the two words “taxi, sir!” I have no complaints. It’s very much a big part of Indian culture. But I have neither need for taxi nor daughter. Shukriya.

Companionship is good, but I don’t want anything to distract me from my work here. I’ve found a deep-rooted happiness living in this country and doing this work. To look after the outcasts in your current society is the only “religion” that moves humanity forward and any “religion” that draws lines and creates differences within humanity can only pull it back into barbarism.

So I lift my head. I lift my eyes. There are around 100 children here at Bethesda Life Centre and most of them want music lessons. How do I help? Do I teach one-on-one? What curriculum do I teach? How do I teach current musicians to teach? How can I think big and long term? How do I manage my time? Will I have time for a chai break? So many questions. That’s what my Mondays are for – headspace, clarity, cooking, writing, planning and resting.

Talking of rest, boy is it needed. Wednesdays to Saturdays require me to be around the children for 5 to 7 hours. They love me being around, and for so many reasons – I’m new, white, from another culture, learning Hindi (hilariously), from Hillsong, a musician, can sing and play Bollywood songs, the list goes on. And because of these novelties, they always want to be around me, laughing, learning and touching my head. For me, a natural introvert, the rate of energy exertion = size of the group of people surrounding me multiplied by the need they have of me. In the homes, that means a very high rate of exertion. I start teaching one kid and 3 more burst into the room and want to be taught or want to show me what they can play or just want to hang out. By the time I get to Sunday, I’m deeply exhausted, bone and soul. Martin and Beena, noticing this, immediately took to action, offering to sit down with me early next week and work out a way for me to teach effectively and not become run down. They’re truly beautiful people.

Sunday was another great day in church. The band did so well with the demanding Young&Free songs like “This Is Living” and “Alive” and every song had flow and purpose.

I also sang… and lead… down a microphone… which was connected to the sound system… that people could hear. Nervous? Surprisingly not. I just gave it a go. I’m not a great singer – my voice gets tired easily and I have no power in my upper range. But leading isn’t about having the best skill, it’s about clarity and confidence and having the ability to create an atmosphere. That being said, all you vocal geniuses out there – please help by posting advice in the comments section below.

So that’s it for another week. I’m off to shell some prawns and scrub my washroom. Wherever you are on this planet, be happy, do what you’re good at, and love where you are.

Sidenotes:

• My work here is voluntary, so your giving is what is enabling me to stay here. If you’d like to give, you can do so via this JustGiving link or send an email to hello@willadammusic.com and I can provide my UK bank details.
• I’ve finished reading three books since I’ve arrived. A personal record.
• I’m looking forward to my good friend Amit visiting from Singapore this coming week and Pratik ‘Mr Samosa’ Kore visiting the week after.
• I’m very thankful to Vernon from church for taking me to Panjim market and buying me groceries and taking me out to lunch on Sunday.
• I’m coming to really enjoy my Sunday visits from my gecko friends.